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Karen KalliKids Founder
7 Silly Mistakes New Parents Make
Poking Your Sleeping Baby to Make Sure They're Breathing
After a long hard day crying you’ve finally got your little bubba to settle down to sleep, you put on the baby monitor and collapse on the sofa.
But doesn’t the baby monitor sound a little too quiet? After staring at your baby for a couple of minutes you’ve completely convinced yourself that they usually breathe much louder than this.
Just to be sure you give your baby a slight prod in the ribs, another 3 hours of bawling ensues… but at least you know they're breathing.
Putting a Recently Potty-Trained Kid into the Car Without Making Them Go to the Bathroom First
You’ve finally taught your little one to use a potty!
You relish the idea of not having to change nappies anymore and are excited to not spend the rest of your life covered in your child’s urine.
Not so fast. After 30 minutes in the car, you begin to smell the familiar scent and know somethings not right.
Even though the adamantly claimed they did not need the toilet before you set off, something now tells you they were lying.
Going Rogue When Installing the Car Seat
You and your partner are very much in love. It seems nothing can tear apart the connection you two have and you vehemently swear you will love each other forever… that was before you tried to install the car seat.
After slowly feeling the tension building, you start to replace the usual pet names with sighs and eye rolls and after half an hour of your partner trying to force the same large piece of plastic into a hole that’s obviously too small - you begin to imagine strangling them with the seat belt.
Fortunately, you eventually discover the instructions and the most testing times in your relationship draw to a close.
Bumping Baby into a Door Frame
It’s the middle of the night and you hear a bawling from the other room, reluctantly you pull yourself out of bed and make your way slowly to your tot, after scooping them up in your arms you walk towards the kitchen to heat up a bottle, trying not to open your eyes too much so you can still go back to sleep before its time to go to work.
Suddenly you hear a bang and your child starts to really scream. You realise with horror your baby’s head has gone straight into the door frame due to your half-awake state.
Queue a whole hour of you apologising profusely to your baby and promising to get them a pony for their tenth birthday between your own tears. Only to be discovered by your partner who gets an ice pack and tells you to stop blubbing and go back to bed.
Holding a Just-Fed Baby up Above Your Face to Say “Hello”
You’ve finally got your baby to eat all its food after a good couple of hours of airplane noises and sharply telling them to ‘be a good boy’.
Eventually, the charade is over and your baby is full. Success! You hold your baby up in a lion king fashion to tell them how much you love them and how good they’ve been… only for them to empty the recent contents of their stomach straight on to your face.
Worrying Your Baby Isn't Talking
Seeing all the tots at the nursery has started to make them nervous, in comparison to your child, the other kids look as if they should be going to university.
It has never occurred to you before but should your child not be talking a bit more by now?
You see the other children having full blown conversations whilst your baby still calls you ‘Muh’.
However, just when you were about to book your baby into a speech therapist, doctor and shamanic healing session an even littler tot crawls in through the door.
You look at this tiny child barely pulling itself along the ground as your child races around the nursery. ‘Not walking yet, are we?’ You think to yourself with a smug look on your face, imagining your child’s future as a premiership football player.
Looking for Parenting Advice from the Internet
Your baby is constantly crying, not talking, walking or showing any signs of maturing. You decide to look to the internet for help. Rookie error.
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